Who’s up for forming a new Government?

I’ve just had an idea. Does anyone fancy coming down to London with me to Buckingham Palace?

The plan is to meet up with the Queen and offer to form a new Government. It’s a bit of a long shot, but if I know the Queen, she just might go for it.

Parliament has been dissolved. There are no MPs in Wasteminster. They are all busy trying to get re-elected. The Queen has decreed it so.

There was only going to be one answer when Thersa May went to see the Queen and asked her to dissolve Parliament. I can picture it, “Thank fuck for that, I thought you’d never ask. I’ll be glad to see the back of you”, says the Queen.

The Queen now has an empty Parliament in Wasteminster. The state, theoretically, has an empty house in Downing Street. OK,  Theresa May is still living there, but she is, for all intents and purposes, squatting in Number 10. I’m sure the Queen could get her evicted pronto.

If Parliament has been dissolved then we have no Government. Some people will argue that is not exactly the case, but we can put up an argument.

If about 650 of us could get together, we have effectively filled all the seats in Wasteminster. The vacancies have been filled. There is no need for an election.

We then send a little committee down to Buck Palace offering to form a Government for Her Maj. And hey presto, we are in business. A new Government of the people.

The people have spoken, the will of the people and all that crap.

The Tories might launch a legal challenge, but if we can get Gina Miller on board we can stall them for years, decades even.

Who knows, if we can get to the EU Supreme Court before we get chucked out of the EU they are bound to come down in our favour. Defo. There is no way those EU Judges are going to decide in favour of those Brexit Tories.

Sign up and the first 650 are guaranteed a job. Some may get a ministry. How about that?

Pay is good, very good even, plus expenses. You’ll never need to by another Snickers bar, just bang it on expenses.

Work in the centre of London. Lots of money and goodies thrown at you by lobbyists, fraudsters and general criminal types. But it’s all nicely hidden.

We have a few enemies, but we should be able to deal with them with a few carefully worded bills. No problem.

The only down side is the slight risk of being charged with treason, which, I think, may still carry the death penalty. But I’m hopeful the Queen will be with us.

So who’s up for it?

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